Content; satisfied with what one is or has; not wanting more or anything else.

When we think of our own lives, it’s usually, “I’m in a sunny disposition, so I’m content with my life.” But are we really content? Or are we in a situation where we are being humbled by what is going on in our lives and with that, are learning how to react and are not overreact to the various situations.

We know one thing for sure and that is, we are not “not wanting more or anything else.” Whether you think material or as spiritual as we humans will always long for more. We will always want the new latest and greatest. We will always search for that purpose as to why we are on this Earth. So when you tell someone, “I’m content,” what you are really saying is, “I’m done working hard in life, I give up and I’m settling.”

I’m 22-years-old and I found myself saying, “I’m content and happy with how things are going in my life.” This in response to a question posed at Life Group (our bible study), which was,”Is how your life currently is what you thought it would be?” I answered first and expressed that because of the family I grew up in, I always believed in “Young Love” and I expected to be married by now. But I’m living with my aunt and uncle, I am a college grad and working as a waitress. Obviously this isn’t my ideal situation, but I am also going on a mission trip in June, which I never thought would happen, which would not have been possible if I had a career right after I graduated.

I have thought about all the small things that have come into play since graduation, which add up to this big picture called “my life.” And honestly, if I was married, had children, and had a career, I feel like then I would be “content” with my life. Because with children it would no longer be about me or what I want, it would be what could I do to create and sustain a better life for my kids.

This a serious self-evaluation. It’s opened my eyes and I honestly am beyond grateful with how my life has turned out. Even though I’m living with my aunt and uncle, it has given me the chance to grow a closer relationship with them and made me realize how important family truly is. Even when there are those time that I chat with them and mention that I’m working hard to get my own place, they always tell me, “we aren’t running you off, we are your family and will always be there to help you out, that’s what family is for.” It’s amazing that God has blessed me with a great support system starting with my parents extending throughout the rest of my family.

When I think about “ugh, I’m waiting tables and I graduated college…” I’ve learned several things. One; this is just another chapter in my life and “this too shall pass.” I have learned to be thankful for even having a job, I’m thankful to have a way to earn and save money so that I can soon be financially stable and out on my own. The second lesson is; this is a chance to enjoy what freedom I have before a career takes over my life. Everyone tells me, ” Enjoy it while you can, because once you start working, it doesn’t end till you die.” As disheartening as that sounds, I understand what they mean, and I’ve learned to just not stress about the future, I’ve learned to pray and to lean on God’s understanding and not my own. I know in the end that “He will get me where HE wants me to go in the END.”

As Tommy DePaola & my foot tattoos say, “Now one foot, Now the other.”

So back to the original question asked at Life Group, “Is how your life currently is what you thought it would be?”

My answer now, re-evaluated is this; I would never have guessed that I would be where I am at today. I am a college graduate at the age of 22-years-old, I am on a career hunt, and I have become immersed in church and making tons of friends who are all living their lives through Christ and going through the same things as myself. I am also going on my first mission trip to Jamaica and I have never been more excited for what God is going to bring into my life in the future.

So NO, my life is not what I thought it would be, it’s even better, because God is guiding me on a path that is filling my heart with joy, experiences and hope. I may not know where I’ll be in five years, but I will make a plan but in the end I know that, “We can make plans, but the Lord determines our steps. (proverbs 16:9)”

Don’t stop dreaming. Don’t stop hoping.
And most importantly never lose faith

xo,

Marissa